alotta.wav
Number Two: This is my Italian confidential secretary. Her name is Alotta...Alotta Fagina.
Austin: Come Again.
Alotta: Alotta Fagina
Austin: Uh, I'm sorry, I'm just not getting it. So now you said your name was, uh...nevermind.
angry.wav
Dr. Evil: That makes me angry, and when Dr. Evil gets angry, Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset, and when Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset...PEOPLE DIE!
astute.wav
Scott: I just think like he hates me. I really think he wants to kill me.
Therapist: Now Scott, we don't want to kill each other in here. We might say that we do sometimes, but we really don't.
Dr. Evil: Actually, the boy's quite astute. I really am trying to kill him, but so far unsuccessfully. He's quite wily like his old man.
badly.wav
Mustafa: Someone help me. I'm still alive only I'm very badly burned.
basil.wav
Basil: Hello, Austin. I'm Basil Expostion, with British Intelligence. We have just received word that Dr. Evil is planning a trap for you tonight at the Electo-Psychadelic-Pussycat Swinger's Club here in swingin' London.
bastard.wav
Austin: There's the bastard.
beavis.wav
Beavis: Check it out, Butthead. This chick has three boobs! Heh-heh-m-heh! Yeah!
Butthead: Huh-huh...How many butts does she have?
behave.wav
Austin: Oh behave. Yeah! Yeah baby! Yeah!
bigboy.wav
Private: Well, it appears to be in the shape of Big Boy.
General: God, it's back
Private: Well in many ways, the Big Boy never left sir. He's always offered the same high quality meals at competitive prices.
General: Shut Up!
bigglesworth.wav
Dr. Evil: Look what you did to Mr. Bigglesworth!
billion.wav
Dr. Evil: We hold the world ransom for...ONE HUNDRED BILLION DOLLARS!
bite.wav
Austin Powers: I won't bite....hard.
blowme.wav
Scott: Blow me.
Dr. Evil: Excuse me?
Scott: Show me.
caliber.wav
Dr. Evil: I like to see girls of that..caliber. By caliber, of course I mean, both the size of their gun barrels and the high quality of their characters. Two meanings...caliber...it's a homonym.
capitalism.wav
Basil: The cold wars over.
Austin: Well, finally those capitalist pigs will pay their crimes, eh, eh commrades, eh.
Basil: Austin, we won.
Austin: Oh, groovy, smashing, yea capitalism.
carnies.wav
Austin: Only two things scare me, and one is nuclear war.
Basil: What's the other?
Austin: Excuse me?
Basil: What's the other thing that scares you?
Austin: Carnies.
Basil: What?
Austin: Circus folk. Nomads you know. Smell like cabbage. Small hands.
childhood.wav
Dr. Evil: The details of my life are quite inconsequential.
Therapist: Oh no. Please, please, let's hear about your childhood.
Dr. Evil: Very well. Where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a 15-year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard-really. At the age of 12, I received my first scribe. At the age of 14, an Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There's nothing like a shorn scrotum, it's breathtaking I suggest you try it.
Therapist: You know we have to stop
clothes.wav
Dr. Evil: Do you like your quasi-futuristic clothes Mr. Powers? I designed them myself.
contrare.wav
Austin: Au contrare, baby. I think that you can't resist me.
created.wav
Scott: I hate you. I hate you! I wish I was never artificially created in a lab.
Dr. Evil: Oh, Scott, that hurts daddy when you say that. Honestly.
danger.wav
Austin: Danger's my middle name.
die.wav
Austin: Do you really expect them to pay?
Dr. Evil: No Mr. Powers...I expect them to die.
dipping.wav
Dr. Evil: Begin the unneccessarily slow moving dipping mechanism.
english.wav
Tom: That's one crazy get up you got there fellow.
Austin: Oh, thank you. Tom: Are you in the show?
Austin: No actually, I'm English.
enough.wav
Dr. Evil: Silence Number Two!
Number Two: NO! I've had enough of you pushing me around.
mrevil.wav
Dr. Evil: Dr. Evil! I didn't spend six years in Evil Medical School to become Mr. Thank You Very Much.
evilvet.wav
Scott: I like animals...maybe I'd be a vet.
Dr. Evil: An evil vet?
Scott: No. Maybe, like, work in a petting zoo.
Dr. Evil: An evil petting zoo?
Scott: You always do that!
failure.wav
Dr. Evil: Let this be a reminder to you all that this organization will not tolerate failure.
father.wav
Austin: Personally, before I'm on the job, I like to give my under-carriage a little bit of a 'How's your father?'
fembots.wav
Frau: Bring in the Fembots!
frankenstein.wav
Dr. Evil: Don't look at me like I'm freakin' Frankestein, give your father a hug!
freedom.wav
Austin: It's freedom baby, yeah!
freeze.wav
Frau: Remember when we froze your semen? You said if it didn't look like you were coming back, we should try to make you a son, so that a part of you could live forever?
Dr. Evil: Oh sure.
freezing.wav
Dr. Evil: It's freakin' freezing in here Mr. Bigglesworth
getit.wav
Dr. Evil: You just don't get it do you? You don't.
giggles.wav
Austin: I'm just joking Vanessa. I'm just trying to get a rise out of you, that's all, for shits ang giggles.
groovy.wav
Austin: Oh Groovy baby.
hipster.wav
Dr. Evil: There's nothing more pathetic than an aging hipster.
horny.wav
Austin: Let me ask you a question, and be honest. Do I make you horny? Randy? Do I make you horny baby? Yeah, do I?
hostage.wav
Number Two: That also, has already happened.
Dr. Evil: Shit. Oh hell, let's just do what we always do, kidnap a nuclear warhead and hold the world hostage?
idiots.wav
Dr. Evil: My must I be surrounded by frickin' idiots.
imhip.wav
Dr. Evil: I'm with it. I'm hip. (Macarena)
jet.wav
Austin: When you see this jet a rockin' don't come a knockin' baby, YEAH!
judochop.wav
Austin: Judo Chop!
jumbojet.wav
Austin: My jumbo jet! Smashing baby!
know.wav
Dr. Evil: Some of you I know, some of you I'm meeting for the first time.
lair.wav
Dr. Evil: Welcome to my underground lair. You're just in time. Enjoy the show.
lasvegas.wav
Austin: Viva Las Vegas, baby! Yeah!
laugh.wav
All: (Evil Laugh)
leprachaun.wav
Frau: It's a television commercial. With this cartoon leprachaun, and all of these children are trying to chase him "Hey leprachaun man, leprechaun man, want to catch the Lucky Charms." Oh, and there's always these little tiny bits of marshmallow just stuck right in the cereal, so that when the kids eat them the kids think "Oh this is candy I'm having fun".
dangerously.wav
Austin: I also like to live dangerously.
lockandload.wav
Vanessa: Let's lock and load!
london.wav
Capt.: I'm off to London, England.
uckycharms.wav
Patty: Their always after me lucky charms.
man.wav
Austin: That's not your mother, it's a man baby!
manman.wav
Austin: That ain't no woman, it's a man, man.
margaret.wav
Austin: Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day. Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.
meowmix.wav
Dr. Evil: I want chicken, I want liver, Meow Mix, Meow Mix please deliver.
million.wav
Dr. Evil: Here's the plan. We get the war head and hold the world ransom for...One Million Dollars!
mishaps.wav
Austin: Mishaps? Well isn't that what being an International Man of Mystery is all about?
mojo.wav
Austin: So I thought I'd work my mojo. To counter their mojo. We got cross-mojonation, and their heads started exploding. Well, you know.
mutated.wav
Dr. Evil: What do we have?
Number Two: Sea bass.
Dr. Evil: Right...
Number Two: They are mutated sea bass.
Dr. Evil: Really? Are they ill-tempered?
Number Two: Absolutely.
Dr. Evil: Well that's a start.
ybag.wav
Austin: This sort of thing ain't my bag baby.
myself.wav
Austin: Allow myself to introduce...myself.
mystery.wav
Austin: Well isn't that what being an International Man of Mystery is all about?
nerdalert.wav
Austin: Oh blimey. NERDALERT!!
nowlater.wav
Austin: Should we shag now or shall we shag later?
number2.wav
Austin: Who does Number Two work for? Who does Number Two work for?
Tom: That's right buddy, you show that turd who's boss.
opendoor.wav
Dr. Evil: Open the fricken door!
pardonme.wav
Austin: Pardon me for being rude, it was not me is was my food, it just popped up to say hello, and now it's gone back down below.
prank.wav
Austin: How did this get in here, somebody's playing a prank on me. Honestly, it's not mine.
psycho.wav
Scott: Get away from me you lazy eyed pscho.
pushing.wav
Number Two: I've had enough of you pushing me around.
pussycat.wav
Austin: That's Dr. Evil's cat.
Vanessa: How can you tell?
Austin: I never forget a pussy...cat.
resist.wav
Fembots: You can't resist us Mr. Powers. Austin: Au contrare baby, I think you can't resist me.
sailors.wav
Vanessa Kensington: You know I meant...did you use a condom?
Austin Powers: No-ho-ho-ho! Only sailors use condoms, baby!
Vanessa Kensington: Not in the 90s, Austin!
Austin Powers: Well, they should, those filthy beggars, they go from port to port.
scott.wav
Dr. Evil: My son?
Frau: Ya. SCOTT!!
scrotum.wav
Dr. Evil: There's nothing quite like a shorn scrotum...It's breathtaking...I suggest you try it...
sexdrugs.wav
Austin Powers: ...but as long as people are still having promiscuous sex with many anonymous partners without protection, while at the same time, experimenting with mind-expanding drugs in a consequence-free environment, I'll be sound as a pound!
sexyes.wav
Austin: Okay, Name? Austin...Danger Powers. Sex? Yes, please.
shag.wav
Austin Powers: Fascinating, Vanessa, listen, why don't we go into the back and shag?
Vanessa: What?
Austin Powers: I've been frozen for thirty years! I gotta see if my bits and pieces are still working!
hagadelic.wav
Austin: Very shagadelic.
hagaminx.wav
Austin: My god Vanessa's got a fabulous body. I bet she shags like a minx. How do I tell that because of the unfreezing process I have no inter-monologue. I...hope I didn't say that out loud just now
sharks.wav
Dr. Evil: You know, I have one simple request...and that is to have sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads!
shh.wav
Scott: It's no hassle.
Dr. Evil: Shh!
Scott: But...
Dr. Evil: Shh!
Scott: I'll...
Dr. Evil: Shh!
Scott: All I'm saying...
Dr. Evil: Shh!
Scott: Theyr'e going to get away...
Dr. Evil: Shh!
Scott: I...
Dr. Evil: Shh!
Scott: I...
Dr. Evil: Shh!
Scott: ...
Dr. Evil: Shh!
Scott: ...
Dr. Evil: Knock, knock.
Scott: Who's there?
Dr. Evil: Shh!
Scott: Loo...
Dr. Evil: Shh! Let me tell you about a name about a man named shh! Shh! Even before you start. That was a pre-emptive shh! Just know I have a hole bag of shh! with your name on it.
shoe.wav
Austin: Who throws a shoe? Honestly. You fight like a woman.
shotme.wav
Mustafa: You shot me!
Dr. Evil: Okay, moving on...
Mustafa: You shot me right in the arm. Why did you...
Dr. Evil: Right.
skinemax.wav
Dr. Evil: What are your plans for this evening?
Scott: Well I thought I'd stay in. There's a good tittie movie on Skinemax.
Dr. Evil: And that's how you'd like to live your life, is it?.
Scott: Yeah.
smashing.wav
Austin: I thing your shaggadelic, baby. You're switched on, you're smashing.
stay.wav
Dealer: Five.
Austin: I'll stay.
teeth.wav
Austin: Okay, I get it, I have bad teeth.
thereyouare.wav
Austin: Oh there you are.
Extra: Well hi, do I know you?
Austin: No, but that's where you are, you're there.
throwbone.wav
Dr. Evil: Right. Okay, people you have to tell me these things. Alright, I've been frozen for thirty years, okay? Throw me a frickin' bone here.
today.wav
Dr. Evil: Scott, my boy. How are you? How was your day?
Scott: Well my friend Sweet Jay took me to that video arcade in town, right, and they don't speak english there, so Jay got into a fight. He's all 'Hey quit hassling me because I don't speak French or whatever', and then the guy said something in Paris talk, and I'm like 'just back off!' and they're all 'get out', and we're all 'make me!'. It was cool.
trap.wav
Dr. Evil: I'm going to place them in an easily escapable situation involving an overly elaborate and exotic death.
uglystick.wav
Austin: If that is a woman, it looks like she's been beaten with an ugly stick.
villagebicylcle.wav
Austin: She's the village bicycle, everyone's had a ride.
volume.wav
Austin: WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Basil: The shouting is a temporary side effect of the unfreezing process.
Austin: Yes, I'm having difficulty controlling the VOLUME OF MY VOICE!
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